22 Of History’s Greatest Comebacks, Replies and Retorts

Here’s an awesome collection of the best comebacks, replies and retorts from some of history’s greatest icons in sport, entertainment, politics and literature.

1. Robert Benchley

History's greatest comebacks - benchley



2. William Faulkner and Ernest Hemingway

hemingway and faulkner quote

Faulkner: “He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” Hemingway: “Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?”



3. Oscar Wilde




4. Winston Churchill puts a random woman in her place

churchill on being drunk

Person: “You’re drunk. And what’s more, you’re disgustingly drunk.” Churchill: “You’re ugly. And what’s more, you’re disgustingly ugly. But when I wake up, I’ll be sober, and you’ll still be ugly.”


5. Sparta




6. Mozart




7. Abraham Lincoln




8. Winston Churchill on falling asleep




9. Reed Vs Clay




10. Truman Capote

Captote on signing a mans penis

Capote, after a drunk man pulled his genitals out and asked Capote to autograph them: “I don’t know if I can autograph it, but perhaps I can initial it.”



11. P.G Woodenhouse




12. Ilka Chase




13. Judge Rockwood Hoar




14.Noel Coward Vs Edna Ferber

Noel Coward Vs Edna Ferber

Noel Coward: “Edna, you look almost like a man.” Edna Ferber: “So do you.”



15. Miriam Hopkins

Miriam Hopkins quick comeback to another singer

Singer: “You know, my dear, I insured my voice for $50,000.” Hopkins: “That’s wonderful. And what did you do with the money?”



16. Dorothy Parker




17. Montagu Vs Wilkes

wilkes vs montagu

Montagu: “Sir, I do not know whether you will die on the gallows or of the pox.” Wilkes: “That will depend, my lord, on whether I embrace your principles or your mistress.”



18. Arthur Wellesley




19. Mohamed Ali comeback to Frazier’s comment




20. Ghandi




21. Dorothy Parker’s witty reply to a drunk man.




22. Calvin Coolidge on an opera singer’s performance


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